Fashion Confusion

Yesterday I asked my husband to take me to the Walmart.  Something weird ALWAYS happens when we go to Walmart.  This time it was something that I just can't seem to shake.

The woman in the denim jumpsuit.

The state of fashion in 2011 is confusing for someone like me.  Jumpsuits and anything one-piece (that isn't a dress) are an odd creation.  I don't dislike it, in fact I own a little one-piece strapless shorts romper. Nevertheless, I am still confused.

First of all, I think it is a difficult look to pull off.  You have to have a certain body type and the jumper/romper/onesie has to be cut just right.  Otherwise you risk looking like an over-grown baby or like this....
 
Second, head to toe denim is just a hard look.  A darker wash seems easier than a lighter wash.  And shorts and/or short sleeves keep you from looking like a convict or some kind of "worker guy" as my boys would describe it.

Third, is this 1970?  The thing about the lady in the denim jumpsuit that really had me going is this: I couldn't figure out  if she was really fashionable (shopping at Walmart) or just a throwback.  Everything old seems to be new again and it is tough to judge from a side angle.  I sort of chased her down (fast walking) and checked out her shoes, hair and bag.  Turns out that she was just wearing an ancient 1970's light washed denim jump suit.  Accidentally, almost fashionable, and certainly distracting!  A testament to why I should save my clothes.

Yours for 5 EASY payments!

After a week of not doing being able to do much of anything (except incubate, as Kevin says), I figured that I would have accomplished something.  I'm not sure what I was expecting but my biggest accomplishment to date is falling in love with this sewing machine.  By the way, my mother never taught me to sew, and I have no idea what one does with a "serger".  Thanks to the Home Shopping Network (or as I like to call it HSN), I have to have this machine (and several other featured items).

Yesterday after the boys went to my sister's house, I resumed my post just in time for the great sewing event.  This amazing necessity won't last long at the Event Price of $699.95.  Free shipping and handling!

This whole experience is becoming incredibly surreal.  We're still hoping Baby Lauren will hold out for October.  Your guess is as good as mine though.

For the love of sweet corn

We made the papers!  The boys and I braved the sweet corn crowd at Fresno State's market to feed Patrick's NEED for sweet corn.  The Fresno Bee was there to capture the experience.  You can see me and Keith waiting in line in the background of the picture.  I'm surprised the photographer didn't use the shots of Patrick methodically choosing his corn.  Here's the link to the story in the Bee: Sweet Corn Shoppers.

Luckily we got there early to secure our ears because they sold out by afternoon.  A great day yesterday! 

Errands with Mom

The conversation went something like this:
Patrick: I'm pretty sure he fell on his face. (This was in reference to his brother's nosedive off the cart at Michael's)
Me:  Mmmhmm....
Patrick: I'm also pretty sure that he wasn't doing a trick.  You know how I know that?
Me: No, how?
Patrick: Because he didn't land on his feet.  He landed on his face. 

Perhaps Keith should wear the cape out more often...Or utilize the cart seat belt.  OR SIT DOWN AND STOP TRYING TO GRAB SHARPIE PENS AT THE CHECK OUT LINE!!!!!!
Freaked me out.  Freaked him out.  He's okay.  Bruised ego and a sore head.

I may need professional help

I am seriously considering venturing out for the Black Friday sales.  Did you notice that some stores sweetened the deal by opening at midnight?  Glorious!  I don't know what I want that would necessitate me getting out of bed in the early hours of the morning or even staying up late for that matter (10 pm is late at my house), but I feel it.... I feel the pull of the Super Sale, the Hot Deals, the whatever it may be, I should be there taking part in it.  I can't remember the last time I shopped the day after Thanksgiving but I think it involved a polyblend sweater and purple sweatpants.

There is something wrong with me.

Dear Target.... not so frugal friday

Dear Target,

Please take all of my money. I mean, it is so clear that the $200 weekly deposits just aren't cutting it. And really, what could I possibly need that I can't buy from your aisles? And now you seem intent to make me spend my hard-earned dollar on Ed Hardy paraphenelia. Really, has it really come to this?

And please don't punish me for what happened this week. It was our family's third trip in only five days.... I didn't get a cart. I still managed to spend $60, but I did it without a shopping cart. As I balanced three boxes of potential kindergarten snacks, lip gloss, wrapping paper and school supplies (none of which were on my list) I thought: here is the way I stop spending so much money at this dang store. But really, who am I kidding, your charm is undeniable I'll be back next week with an extra large deposit.

Mama Lou

Frugal Friday Confession

I. Shop. At. forever 21

I'm not 21, I'm not even 31, but the "forever" qualifier is good enough for me. And last time I was there, they weren't checking id's. However, the girl checking me out actually called me "Miss" (score).

So here's the thing. I never, ever pay full price (save that leopard print shirt), except at Forever 21. Everything is just so cheap. I buy a few of my disposable wardrobe items at there. Tops, summer dresses, tank tops, $5 sunglasses for the pool. And even this $6.80 necklace, paired with a $10 top.

I totally get why the Forever 21 concept is big enough to take over the empty Gottschalks and Mervyn's stores. Cheap, trendy clothing is probably better than expensive out-dated clothing. And then I started considering the seemingly unlimited disposable income of the tween and teen set. Those girls spend me under the table. Also, there is very little rhyme or reason to the merchandising in Forever 21. There is just too much stuff. I always get the sense that the store is one strapless top away from exploding all over Ann Taylor Loft. I visited the XXI store in Chicago and it is huge (huge I say, huge!). And I was comforted by the sneaky branding twist with the Roman Numerals.

I'm not advising you to head over to F-21 and start buying things willy-nilly. You have to abide by a couple of rules. 1) There are things in Forever 21 that make you look like you want to be Forever 21 (I'll just say it: hoochie mama). Unless advised by Stacey and Clinton, steer clear of the shirts pretending to be dresses, the tube tops and the leggings. 2) You have to try things on. The return policy is a pain (the clientele might be the sort that wears and returns) and the sizing is completely whacked. If you want to dress a size down, go to Banana. At F-21 you will almost certainly need a size larger. 3) Don't turn around when you see the bandana top in the window. There are hidden gems in this retail jungle, you just have to keep looking. Really, I promise.

I'm a shopper and I don't care what the 13 year olds think of me. I will brave F-21 with the kids to uncover a deal any day. This experience is not for the faint of heart. Happy shopping.

Frugal Friday: Tanky Tanky Top

Is anyone else appalled by the price and quality of kids clothes? I am particularly disappointed by the stores (target, i'm looking at you) that try to charge $15 for polyester pajamas (that's 100% pure man made polyester).

Instead, my boys rock the (100% cotton) plain white tank top (sometimes white tee) and undies/diaper every night. Walmart has five Hanes tank tops and five pairs of briefs (although Patrick prefers Hanes comfort waistband boxer briefs) for the same price as ONE PJ set ($15).

Double bonus, the boys love to wear these tank tops to play outside, eat popsicles and all of those messy boy activities that stain $22.50 shirts (times two). And really, don't they look so cute in their W.B.'s?


Word of advice, the Hanes brand has a hem on the bottom, the Fruit of the Loom brand doesn't. We have several Fruits and they haven't frayed, I just get annoyed by the look and the Fruit runs pretty small. It doesn't contain Keith's pot belly.

Triple bonus, I didn't leave you out girls. Old Navy is having a tank top deal this weekend. $2 tanks! Saturday June 20th only. Have at it!

Tomorrow I buy powdered milk.

I have systems in place to guard against Extreme Bad Mommy-ness. I might forget that it is St. Patrick's Day, but we always have toilet paper! Friday is shopping day, I know I at least have to buy two gallons of milk for the week, and I usually buy a loaf of bread (you should see our freezers, stocked with the bread). This morning I poured Keith the last cup of milk. Friday is shopping day, today is Thursday! WHAT!?!?!

Of course since today is Thursday and Friday is shopping day, I forgot to stop by the store on the way home. We probably could have gone after dinner but we went on a walk instead.... Post-bath: I met the milk deficit problem head-on. I did what every Bad Mommy would do, I poured him a nice big cup of Half and Half. HE LOVED IT! He's going to be so disappointed when he goes back on the 2% tomorrow.

Oh, and also, you know you are the mother of boys when you are snapping these pictures AND you think they are hilarious.

He was looking for these, his new tech decks. Bad Mommy made a special trip to pick these Age 9 and up toys for Keith's birthday. He was thrilled.

It's Friday and I'm Frugal

The last time I paid full price for clothes I had a little (major) panic attack in the middle of Express. It was 2000 and I was purchasing a silk leopard print shirt for $58 that I could ill afford. In the end it was worth it, I rocked that shirt at Speaker Hertzberg's Swearing-in Gala the same year. And I still have it hanging in my closet, nine years later. You don't get rid of silk, silk you hang onto.

One of my favorite Mommy Bloggers, OhMommy swears by the quality over quantity rule. High quality classic pieces that can last a lifetime. And of course if it has a label that makes you giddy, even better.

I have a price point, it is $5. I would buy just about anything for $5. Like this watch...
I came back two weeks later for this watch.
But in general, I just love a deal, a really good deal on high end goods makes my day.

A few months ago my friend Jennifer and I were power shopping at Off Saks. I was lucky enough to meet this darling. She's perfect for a beach vacation, she's the maxi dress of my dreams, and she's mostly silk (no relation to the full-priced silk shirt). To top it all off she's DIANE von FURSTENBERG.
I may be the only person to appreciate the beauty of this dress but I really don't care.
Insert beach and beachy cocktail (all available on polyvore, I'm sure), and sigh.

Back to the deal.... I am completely annoying because I could talk about shopping and clothes all day. Poor Kevin has to play the "what was Lindsay's deal" (Heh) game all the time. How much do you think I spent on this? What do you think the original price was? Now you can play...Make your guesses?

Original price: $425, marked down to $254.90. To me, there isn't a big difference between those two prices. I would have to wear this dress to work every day to justify either price.

SALE PRICE: $147.99---- This my friend's is the reason I have not owned a maxi dress. This is how much these things cost!
But I paid.... $35.18 plus $2.73 in sales tax to the fine people of Folsom (sorry shop local people, my bad). Let me comp this for you, you can't get a poorly cut, all man-made material dress at your leading retail chain for less than $40. No comparison. Sigh.

27 Pants

Just like the movie, only funny and cute.

My baby is turning two. Some days he acts like he is 6, other days he is content to let me hold him in my lap (just like a baby). He is a fantastic little boy but that is not the point of this blog post.

Because Keith is turning 2 and warmer weather has arrived (with a thunderstorm or two, but whatever), I decided to bust out the 2T boy clothes bins. There were 3, I think. I washed and folded all of the 2T clothes handed down from Keith's brother and cousin.

As I was folding, sorting and stacking the pile of pants (not shorts, that's another tale) kept growing and growing. Keith Fox is the proud owner of 27 pairs of pants!!!!! He could practically wear a different pair of pants every day of the month. Except for his attraction to mud puddles, which generally requires 2-3 a day, which means he could wear a different pair of pants for two weeks. But still, that is an impressive wardrobe accomplishment for a nearly 2-year old.

At first I thought that I should blame my sister.... That didn't work, I could remember purchasing almost all of the pants for Patrick. And then it dawned on me today.... Potty Training. Potty training requires extra undies, extra patience and lots of extra pants. I guess we are ready to potty train. (MY BABY!)

Now where the heck am I going to put all of these pants!?!?!

Life change, just you wait.

It is Two for Thursday (pretend I started writing this on Tuesday). Or maybe it's BOGO. Whatever it is, I'm giving you two life changing items in one blog post.

1) A Basket, A Friend
The Market Basket changed my life.

My sister put the Market Basket on her Christmas list, my mom liked it so much she bought them for everyone. I would never pick this for myself, I would never put this on my Christmas list (my list included the Sex and the City movie (didn't get it), Seven jeans (didn't get them, thankfully since now that I look, I realize that I was asking for jeans that would have been 3 sizes too big), and a pasta machine-which I got and love. And I absolutely love this basket.

I get so many questions, comments and compliments about my basket. It is great. I use it almost every day.

On schooldays: I usually try to get things organized the night before. This is a good way to localize the chaos (permission slips, show & tell, checks, invites, thank-yous, silkies, tuition checks, etc.). In the morning, I put everything else in the basket, including my odds and ends (planner, cell phone, office keys, coffee). So, as I go about my leisurely morning I plunk more things into my basket (capacity 50 lbs., IMpressive).

Then at the end of the day all the (junk) that comes home from school (art projects, random one-eyed monster renderings, pennies, rocks, sweatshirts, gloves, hats, book orders) goes right in the basket. Then we add mail, stinky milk cups (from the leisurely breakfast the boys have in the car most mornings) and any other item that is trying to set up house in the vehicle of the day. Sometimes it still takes me two trips to unload the car, but this is down from four or five (and I used to give up and leave stuff behind). My cars are so neat!

Then it is Patrick's job (Keith usually helps, monkey see) to unload the basket while I make dinner. Listen to me: CHANGED MY LIFE.

Errands: I tend to be overly ambitious on the rare occasion I have time to run errands. So organization is critical to leveling my mediocrity. I always have something to return, a coupon I have to use, a fabric swatch to be matched and banking to do. As I build up to my errand running my basket serves as Org. Central. I know that I could just stick this all in my purse but I change purses almost every day AND the topless nature of the basket is helpful to remind me where to go next. I'm the one going around and around the roundabout at Riverpark trying to remember what comes next.

Garnet Hill and Sur La Table both carry the Market Tote. buy me, buy me, buy me.

2) An Advisor, A Friend.

The last time I mentioned a FREE and useful online resource that had changed my life the company soon started charging $10 per year for online access! Coincidence? I think not. So run and click on this FREE and useful online resource now. But first, the build-up...

Every Friday night at our house is movie night. Most weeks Patrick asks whether it is movie night, Every Night. Patrick and Keith have their own Netflix queue, reserved for kid-friendly Friday night movies. Maybe I'm overprotective (and proud of it, okay?) but I think a PG rating is an indicator of mild to serious inappropriate content. I don't have the time (or patience) to sort through the content. Lucky for me on one of my Netflix Kid Queue Quests I found COMMON SENSE

Common Sense Media is a non-profit organization dedicated to "improving kids' media lives." CSM provides reviews of family movies on Netflix. On the movie's Netflix page you will see the age in a colored bubble, you can click for more information including violence, language, sexual content, social behavior, even consumerism (yes please!).

On the CSM home page you can get information on movies, books, video games, TV, and music. At first I was excited about the quick and easy age selector. But it is the "Parents need to know" section that is the most informative. Then based on my kids (and my mood) I make a choice about the movie. CSM also provides "discussion topics" for families, which kind of feels like homework but okay whatever.

Patrick goes crazy when I say "butt" or "poop". He says a little prayer everytime someone on tv says "stupid". I love my innocent child who is four and half and doesn't need to see or hear things that are only appropriate for double-digit kids. Keith is 13 (learned how to ride the scooter today at Grandma Carolyn's) and he watches all of the versions of The Real Housewives and DVRs In Treatment.

Tempting, oh so tempting

I've mentioned that Patrick is highly susceptible to the messages sent over the talking picture box. Really, he buys into it all. Billy Mays is a hero in our house.I am constantly running to the phone to order ShamWows! and Perfect Caulk. What can I say, it makes Patrick and Kevin happy. They can SHAMWOW back and forth for hours.

The latest thing that we saw on tv and HAVE TO HAVE? The amazing Snuggie of course. Does anyone own one of these? Patrick NEEDS the Snuggie because he "needs to be able to use his hands and the blanket just falls off." I considered it, I did.

The person who really needs the Snuggie? Keith. Or me, so I don't have to re-blanket Keith every time his perfect cocoon slides off. Buy one get one free! Maybe the Easter Bunny will be generous this year.

The Year Without Costco... Kind Of

Just in case you were wondering, all of my crazy ideas originate from npr . The Year Without Costco was no different.

I can't remember when I heard the story or exactly what the point was but somewhere out there, there is a (crazy) couple who only shops once a year. ONCE A YEAR! For everything from toilet paper to birthday presents. Do you hear that sound? It's Me, gasping in shock and horror. It is the same sound I made a year ago when I was closing out our 2007 finances and realized how much money we spent at Costco in '07.

Quite possibly a car payment....

I quickly cross-referenced this catastrophe with my npr files and ran a search on my known resources and came up with a serviceable solution.... the biggest problem with the Costco price tag is not the things we need from Costco, it is the things we pick up when we go to buy the things we need. The artichoke dip that jumps into the cart. The sweat suit that hangs off the side. The vat of nacho cheese.... just kidding, I'm over that phase of my life.

So if we can limit our trips to Costco to ONE, then we can limit our annual Costco bill. And as an added bonus we have a few hundred dollars in Costco rebates to defer the cost of this ONE shopping trip.

I don't have any idea how the people who shop for everything only once per year do it but this is what we had to do in preparation for our one Costco trip.

1. Figure out storage. Luckily we have three refrigerators and a decent amount of storage in the garage. We also cleaned and rearranged the pantry to free up shelf space.
2. Make a list (Stage One). We had to figure out what the shelf stable staples we needed for the year. paper towels, baby wipes, dish soap, garbage bags.....
3. Make a list (Stage Two). Figuring out how many rolls of toilet paper your family uses is the calculation that will make your head spin.
4. Wait for Rebate Check. tick-tock tick-tock
5. Get to shopping!

We spent $261 out of pocket in our Year Without Costco Trip 2008. We also made several mistakes....

1. We took the boys with us, late in the evening. We needed at least two flat beds but instead had one flatbed and one cart. By the end of the trip we were just trying to survive, let alone think about how many whatever's we needed to get through until whenever.
   
2. We underestimated in a number of areas, mostly paper products. We have had to supplement paper towels at least twice.
   
3. Some things just aren't made to stay on the shelf for a year, including condiments.
   

And despite my vow to not step into a Costco in 2008... well, that didn't work out so well. In 2007 we made 12 trips to Costco, in 2008 we made 6. To add insult to injury, most of the six trips were significantly more expensive... almost $100 more each trip on average. Overall, we spent less, but you know, that's not saying much.

This year our Costco rebate is significantly more. I'm voting to use the money to replace the flat screen in our bedroom with a bigger one. Kevin says, "We'll see."

He is the one who wants a new tv, I think he really enjoyed the Year Without Costco Trip and wants a repeat performance. He loves a challenge.

I hearby declare that I am incapable of saving money. I also accept the fact that Costco is a fact of life and as much as I hate the place, I'm an American who needs her big box stores (BAD). And I don't know why I am picking on Costco, the real problem is Target. Love you, hate you, bye.

Never go on trips with anyone you don't love

That's my man Hemingway.

Lately? I've been around the world and I, I, I.... Usually I don't see traveling as a good way to spend my free time. It isn't that I don't like to travel, I just don't want to spend another 6 hours in the car and/or airport. And I tend to need as much time at home as possible when travel is crazing (you like that?) up my life.

This Saturday I had a speaking engagement (for work, on a Saturday, that also happened to be Valentine's Day) so I decided to make it worth my while and bring everyone with. Patrick was so excited you would have thought he had been offered a trip to Disneyland.

I needed to get away. I needed to order room service and go to bed early. I needed to see the City. I needed to contemplate a public organized pillow fight.

The absolute best part of the trip? We walked from North Beach to Pier 39, and on our way we found a lovely hat shop. And we got our portion of the stimulus package pay-out in hat discounts! The shop had all the hats 44% off in honor of our 44th president!

Kevin and Patrick both got hats. Patrick's has a karate kid on it.... cute yes, but check out my hot husband. I love him in that hat. Happy Valentine's Day.

If you look closely at Patrick's face it looks like he has chocolate on his cheek. It is actually balsamic vinegar. He ate bread with olive oil and balsamic for lunch. Because traveling is about eating, sleeping and shopping (usually in that order). After eating and shopping, we walked. Then we rested. Look at these boys, lap of luxury I tell you.



Directly from the only in San Francisco files, Keith and I ran right into the San Francisco Valentine's Day pillow fight. At 6:00 pm, a mob descends, pillows in hand to beat friends and strangers alike with pillows. It was quite the scene. Keith thought the flying feathers were hilarious. In the morning we watched the clean-up from the hotel. White feathers littered the grass like a light blanket of snow. Piles of feathers had been swept into perfect mounds. The big job remained: the pillows and feathers abandoned in the fountain. As the crew of four took care of business, three of the four watched as the crew leader pulled a pillow out of the fountain. He looked like he was lifting a bag of cement, not a feather pillow. Which might just be the most precise metaphor for my life right now. So thank you San Francisco, I needed that.

The Consumer in Me is the Consumer in You

Have I told you how much I really really like stuff? It must be contagious because Patrick seems to love consuming as much as I do (if not more).
I am definitely convinced by all of the research about how susceptible kids are to media messages.

• "Mom, I can't sleep. Maybe we should get some of that AMIEN (read: Ambien) stuff they sell on tv."
  
• One of his favorite things to say: IS IT ALL NATURAL?
• "Mom, Martha Stewart says...." He slept with his October Martha Stewart catalog for a week. It isn't Martha he loves so much as it is the idea of Martha and her love of Halloween. And he also loves to school me, hence the quote.

Okay, so none of those things are remotely age-appropriate. How about this.... Did I tell you that he has been scrapbooking his Christmas list since September? I got sick of trying to keep track of his WANTS and hatched a brilliant idea. Cut out all of the things you want from the catalogs and scrapbook them. It has gotten a little out of control. He has pages and pages of lists. He has everyone scrapbooking their own lists for Santa... The perfect Sunday activity for my little consumer.

Right now he is convinced that he needs cowboy boots AND spurs (as he says, the circle things with the spikes). Just what I need, a four-year old with spurs.

He also becomes oddly attached to things. I say odd and realize that I admitted to kissing my shoes goodbye (read the title again. oh, now I get it. you are me. heh.) After the first round of Halloween decorating, Keith,by a miscalculation on my part, managed to break one of my ghost votives (it was a pair, he only got his mitts on one). I wasn't home, Kevin was putting laundry away upstairs. Patrick came in sobbing, "Keith broke Mom's ghost! It was her favorite ghost! She is going to be so sad!" When Kevin told me about it I laughed and went about my business. Patrick repeated the story to me as well. The next day when I looked at my lone ghost I WAS really sad. I'm still not really over it and I still think about the shoes.

Mom and Patrick's Favorite Stores:
HomeGoods
Sur La Table
Michaels
Target

We have an awesome new project that we are going to start very soon. It isn't even a holiday project! Although I am sure we will have a few of those in the coming weeks too.

Happy shopping, my holiday shopping is almost finished! But by all means keep scrapbooking for Santa.